Did you SEE her? Look at That Mother!

Did you SEE her?  That mother across the street just screamed and freaked out at her child. Did you see how angry she was?  Look at her!  Whoa.  Take it easy, Momma.  The child just stepped onto the street and I think the car was far enough away that the child was not going to get hurt.  Settle down!  You totally over-reacted.  I would never yell at my child like that.

Did you SEE her?  That mother across the street just yelled at her child.  Did you really see her? She was frightened.  When she gets scared that something terrible may happen to her child, her fear mistakenly presents itself as anger.  She once witnessed a small child get hit by a car and injured.  She will never forget that day.  When her child stepped onto the road, images of that accident came flooding back and escaped through her voice in a yell of desperation to save her child from harm.  I have yelled at my children in fear as well.  It is not pretty, but it has kept them alive and safe.  That mother was really just trying to protect her child.

Did you SEE her?  I don’t even know why she bothered to come to the park today.  She is just sitting there like a zombie.  She isn’t talking to anyone and she looks like she hasn’t slept in days.  She isn’t even playing with her daughter.  She is just staring at her while she swings.  It’s kind of creepy.

Did you SEE her?  At least she was able to muster enough strength and energy to bring her little girl to the park to play today.  She is trying her best to “keep it together” but it is hard since she had a miscarriage last week.  She has cried herself to sleep each night and her heart aches so much that even simple things seem hard.  Yet she knows life carries on around her.  She stares at the beautiful little girl she has, thinking about the sibling she almost had.  It’s heart-breaking.

Did you SEE her?  Actually I never see her.  She lets her child run around outside by himself every day.  She is never outside supervising him.  What if he gets hurt?  What if he needs something? What kind of parenting is this?

Did you SEE her?  Actually, she is watching her son from the kitchen window the entire time while she washes the dishes.  She believes in fostering his independence.  She has the windows open so she can hear him as well.  He comes in the house when he needs her.  He is learning to play independently and gaining confidence every day.  This is her style of parenting.

Did you SEE her?  Look at that mother…

Sometimes I am the first voice;  the voice of judgement and shame.   I don’t like when I hear this voice.  This voice needs to be silenced.

Sometimes I am the second voice; the one who tries to find the good in her.  I try to think of her story and to understand her actions.  Sometimes I actually know her story and I remind myself.  Other times I make up her story to help change my view of her.  I try to relate to her on some level and remember my own flaws instead of pointing out those flaws in her.  I want to hear more of this voice.

If we all heard more of the second voice, we might look a little softer at each other.

Be the second voice. Change the dialogue in your head when you look at other mothers. Tell yourself her story.  Find the good in her.  Don’t just see her –  SEE her.

He Lifts Us Up

 

Last Saturday, during the early morning chaos that unfolds in our house every weekend, I caught a glimpse of my husband that brought tears to my eyes. He was once again coming to my rescue.  I had been up early with our two youngest and I was already exhausted from a stressful week. I was in the living room and he was in the kitchen with three of our four children.  One son sat quietly sulking in the corner. He was considering the words his father told him to be true just moments ago about being a good brother. Sometimes the truth hurts as the words from his idol sting with righteousness.  Our other son was in  mid conversation with his father who was convincing him to  “be the best he could be” and to always give his best effort. They were talking about hockey but they both know this fatherly advice applies to all areas of life. Our littlest one was crying and wanting to be picked up.  Without hesitation he lifted him up and he instantly settled.  In that moment I realized how he is always “lifting us up”.

He lifts up our little one when he longs to feel safe and secure in Daddy’s arm, setting him down only once he feels better. He lifts the confidence of a boy who has incredible potential and releases all doubt the child has in himself.  He lifts the expectations of a son who he knows can improve and pushes him to be the best person he can be.  In that moment, I sat in our chair to catch a five minute break, thankful he was awake and in awe of how quickly he can bring order to the house. One look at this incredible father and my spirits lifted. He lifted up my spirits and renewed my energy for the day ahead.  He is always there, lifting us up.

Whenever I hear the Josh Groban song, “You raise me up”, I think of my husband and the image of the photograph below comes to mind.  This is just one of the many times he has lifted up one of our children and placed them on his shoulders.  They love to ride on their father’s shoulders. They feel powerful and their view of the world instantly changes.

 “I am strong when I am on your shoulders, you raise me up, to more than I can be.”

A good father lifts his family up.  He lifts us when we are down.  He lifts us higher than we ever thought we could be.  He is there for us always,  raising us up.  He raises us higher than himself, above all others, and closer to God.  When a father lifts up his family, he is doing the work of God.  Of course Josh Groban is singing about God in the song, “You Raise Me Up” and the lyrics ring true as he praises our Father.  When a father cares for his family the way my husband does for us, I see glimpses of God’s work and it lifts me up.

Naomi Pelss, contributor for Catholic Mommy Blogs

Fun with Karma -Win a Copy of the Game!

If you like card games, you will love this new game called “Karma” by SET Enterprises.

This card game is the perfect present for FIVE CROWNS fans!  It is made by the creators of Five Crowns (another popular card game). Play your cards carefully to go out as soon as you can, but be sure to use them wisely because in this game…What Goes Around…Comes Around!™  It’s a great game that you will want to play again and again. Great for travel and family gatherings.

Age: 8 to adult • Players: 2 to 6

You can win a copy of this award-winning game!  Comment on the blog below for a chance to win.

My family recently tested out this game.  I played with two of my sons (ages 7 and 10).  They quickly caught on and soon ganged up on their poor mother.  We had a lot of fun and that same night our son asked to play it again.  I think it may become a family favourite.

Card games have many benefits

· Bridge the generational gap: Games help bring families together by entertaining and exercising the minds of both young and old.
· Boredom busters: Fight cabin fever, melt minutes off the waiting clock, laugh and play on a rainy day, and so much more.
· Quality time: Games fulfill the essential need for play and interaction between children and parents. They offer a great way to unplug and be present together.

You can learn how to play by reading the instructions or by watching this video:

Set Enterprises, Inc. is a family owned game company. Marsha Falco, our founder and game inventor, started the company in 1990 with a single game called SET®. Twenty-five years later the company is owned and operated by her daughter, Colette Falco. It now has a global presence; Marsha’s games are sold in over 40 countries. Set Enterprises offers an exceptional line of America’s Favorite Card Games®: Five Crowns®, Quiddler®, Karma and, of course, SET!

Check out Set games website to see all the games available and learn how to play them all!

*This is a sponsored post.  Set Enterprises gave me a couple of games to test, review and give away.  My family loved playing Karma and we think you will too! *

Comment below for a free entry and chance to win this game.  

Winner will be chosen December 23, 2016.